After setting up an Internet dating profile, it’s easy to quickly get demoralised.
The problem is that you are fighting for attention with lots of similar messages. Unless your messages stand out from the crowd, then often it will never even be fully read.
So how do you start an Internet dating conversation that the target of your interest simply cannot resist responding to?
1. Ask them a question about something on their dating profile
If you show that you have actually read someone’s profile, you dramatically increase your chances of getting a response against using a generic question. This is especially important if you are a man contacting a woman, because they get generic conversation starters 20 times a day.
If there isn’t much on that persons profile, you could ask them something about one of their profile photos. Internet dating is all about first impressions, so make sure you give that person the impression you are interested about them as an individual, so never ask a question about physical attributes.
2. Look at your topic as a conversation starter
Whatever question you ask someone in an effort to get them to reply, try to make it a question that is an obvious conversation starter.
What this means specifically in terms of an online dating conversation starter, is that you are trying to get the person to both respond to you, and ask a question in return. If you can engineer this, then you stand more chance of a free-flowing messaging conversation taking place.
As an example, let’s say that on the target of your interests profile they mention that they like canoeing. Structure a question to show that you are interested in the fact they go canoeing, such as asking them where they go canoeing.
But as well as asking them whether you go canoeing, you could also state that you never tried but have often thought about doing so. That could be enough to get them to send a question back to you as part of their response.
3. Try to pitch your conversation starter correctly for the person who will read it
Now although this is not ever going to be hundred percent certain, it is often possible to tell what sort of person somebody is through their dating profile.
Often people fall into broad categories, such as geeks, sporty types, go-getters, homely types and others I’m sure you can spot quite often.
If you think you can spot the type of person they are, then it is sometimes possible to tailor a question that will appeal to their personality type.
As an online dating conversation idea pitched at a personality type, telling someone you perceive to be a geek that you like something to do with the technical topic could be the conversation tip that provokes an interested response.
4. Try asking someone about the dating site you are both on
A good tactic, especially if you have seen that person active on the dating site for quite a few weeks, is to ask them how they are getting on.
By doing so, you can generate enthusiasm in their response, through sharing their disasters, message volumes and general annoyance or happiness with online dating.
It can also be great way to generate an immediate bond, by empathising with the struggle. Never underestimate the power of simply talking about the situation you are both currently in.
5. If all else fails try to make them laugh
If you are really struggling to come up with something intelligent to ask the target of your interest, then try humour.
You may not hit the spot, but as long as they are not offended then they will see that you at least making an effort to connect with them.
Humour is not recommended if there are other tactics you can use that may be more fail proof in generating an internet dating conversation. But if all else fails, targeting the funny bone can work.