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How To Start A Great Conversation On An Online Dating Website

Published: April 5, 2015 | Last Updated: February 28, 2021

When it comes to getting into the real world and with the person you are interested in, wondering how to take that first step and start a conversation on an online dating website is one of the biggest considerations.

If you get it wrong, online dating is usually totally unforgiving.  There is rarely a second chance when it comes to making a great first impression in the harsh world of online messaging, where you cannot see a persons reactions and where you do not know enough about them to connect all the time.


So how exactly do you start a conversation that could lead to a date?

 

That Starting Dating Conversation Must Include The Following Key Ingredients

Whether you are trying to start a conversation with a girl or a guy on an online dating site, the principles for what works and what does not work are the same.

Your first message needs to include the following key ingredients:

1. A great salutation.
Not Hello or Hi, but something different and catchy.  Statistics show that “Howdy” works very well, despite being very cheesy.

2. Hook them in with your first sentence.
Make the first sentence a great opener.  If you don’t catch their interest then you could lose them.  Remember the aim is the get your email read and for them to look at your profile and reply.

3. Keep your message interesting throughout.
This means working on hitting just one or two main topics and questions.  Don’t overload your message, ask too many questions or go on for too long.

4. Keep your message short and punchy.
As a rule your opening message should contain a handful of one or two sentence paragraphs.  You should hook them with you first paragraph and close that in the second , then a few facts in a couple of paragraphs, ending with a question.

5. End with a question.
You need to hook that guy or girl on with your first conversation by ending it with a question.  By doing this you invite them to not only continue to conversation, but also to reply to your question.  The question should be easy and allow them to open up about themselves.

 

Good Opening Conversations Should Be Appealing But not Romantic

Starting a good conversation in online dating means creating a great first message that covers the points we have mentioned above.

It is also about looking at their profile and building part of your message around what you find.  This shows you have looked at their profile and that you are interested in them as a human being.

This applies to both men and women, so girls don’t go thinking that you can just be lazy and keep hitting reply and sending one liners.  If you work harder to connect, then you will attract and retain the interest of the right kind of men.

And for men, your opening dating email should convey interest, humility, and always steer clear of mentioning physical attraction – they know you think they are nice that’s why you’re messaging them!

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Filed Under: Dating Discussion, Online Dating Tips Tagged With: start a conversation

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